|Bowl - Apparently Made Out of Gold|
I ordered these dishes online the other day. The pattern is discontinued, but I liked it so well that I decided it was worth it to pay extra for what I wanted. I ordered six dinner plates and six salad plates since my "family" is quite small these days. The soup bowls cost a king's ransom, and I am still kicking around whether I want to invest that much into the bowls.
I've spent most of my life being frugal, practical, stretching a dollar, "getting by," "doing" with what was available or affordable -- usually least expensive.
Raising four children tends to push what you want to the back of the line. Thirty years of raising children can cause you to forget what you even liked. That's the case with me. Dreaming, missing things, was too painful. I didn't like feeling wistful for things I couldn't possibly have, so I just pushed them away. Eventually, I forgot what it was that I even liked.
Now I'm exploring, indulging myself. It's fun. It feels decadent and sinful somehow, to choose something just because I like it. Even more fun is rediscovering what *I* like. I spent so many years being practical, compliant, settling for what everyone else wanted because "it wasn't important." Eventually, the message I taught myself was that I wasn't important.
Trying not to do the whole pendulum swing where I over-indulge or over-compensate. Or at least, I'm over-compensating in small areas like cool notebooks and pens and incense.
It's fun to rediscover myself - or discover this person I've quietly grown into over the last thirty or so years. I didn't realize she existed. She's kind of cool. ~~GH