I'm beginning to realize there are no explanations for the things I most want to understand. Coming to accept this is another thing. I tend to want to label this as immature, which translates into negative, or "bad." Trying hard to let go of those value judgments and labels. It is what it is. I'm where I am, and that is enough.
I'm doing my best to let go of that rope, that sense of control. It is a challenge. And kinda funny to imagine struggling to let go. Sigh.
Only a human being can get themselves into such a complicated situation that they hold on and fight to let go.
Thank you for reading. ~~GH